What on Earth is Final Fantasy All The Bravest

What is this I don't even

I got a fever and the only cure is more ATB

It turns out that yesterday’s Square Enix teaser site wasn’t counting down to an announcement but to a full on release: Final Fantasy All The Bravest is already out in the shadowy dystopian future world of New Zealand.

Yesterday I rashly speculated that a Final Fantasy game with graphical nods to the franchise’s 8-bit roots would be an RPG – boy was I wrong. Get a load of this description:

The Active Time Battle system is back with the largest parties in FINAL FANTASY history!
FINAL FANTASY ALL THE BRAVEST is a touch-action RPG in which you continuously battle enemies to advance through the game’s many stages [..]

Touch multiple characters in quick succession to experience exhilarating and fast-paced battle unlike anything you’ve ever played before!
Once every three hours, the Fever option will appear. Once activated, you will be able to attack without waiting for ATB gauges to refill as long as the chocobo-themed music is playing.

Ummm…. okay. Whatever the dickens this is, it’s not an RPG as you and I know it. All The Bravest is available now in New Zealand and will be arriving in your part of the world around midnight local time.

UPDATE: Here’s the trailer. It’s mental – but not in the Terry Gilliam sort of way I was hoping it would be from the description. It’s a bit more cynical than that.

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